Saturday, August 19, 2006

God is SO good

This morning was glorious. I believe it is the first time I've gone to the abortion mill and enjoyed it. The presence of the Lord was there with us as we worshipped Him together. It was an amazing time of prayer. We wept tears of joy, because no babies were slaughtered there this morning; no mommies paid a hitman to dissect their innocent, precious baby, who bears the image of Almighty God. Most of us, too, wept sorrowful tears, as well...for the babies who weren't so fortunate...for the ones who never did see the light of day, the babies whose names are known only by God. So many untold stories, unlived lives because of the murder. For the past year I've been going there weekly; for some its been much longer. Each week we would arrive hoping that the Lord would be willing to save some. And at times He did use us, His humble nobodies, to rescue a baby or two from the gruesome death they were so immanently facing, and in the thrill of one life being saved, we (or at least I) had a tendency to forget that so many were still in there, being taken to the slaughter. Only God knows how many babies have died in that place. There have been times I've gone there and forgotten that just feet away, two dozen babies were being torn up, feeling their limbs ripped off, silently screaming, heard only by God.

I've got a confession...I've gone there sometimes not so much with a heart to serve the King, but just because "it's what I do." When I first started going to this field of souls, there was a brokenness like none other that I've felt. And over the months and weeks of going, it has faded to an extent. There are times when I am completely broken, but not like that first time. The brokenness was painful, but sometimes I miss it. It was a brokenness that compelled me to do everything I could; it made me willing. It compelled me to get on my face before God and cry out to Him for the lives of these babies, and the souls of their mothers. And while I'm still willing and praying, sometimes I just go through the motions and "do what I do." But the fact of the matter is...every week, babies are being murdered. Each life is just as important, the soul of every mother no less in need of a Savior than the ones who were there the first week. How I wish I still had the brokenness I did. It is my prayer that that brokenness will return, for good. No, I don't want to be unable to eat for days...and I don't particularly want everything I see to remind me of each mother; I want to be able to focus when I read and talk to people, and go through my day...but I still long for my heart to break like it once did. I want to return to the battlefield with real zeal and passion. I want to serve my Master, as He deserves to be served.

But we rest from our holy labors for a short moment. We glory...glory in the present, and in the thought of eternity, knowing that nothing WE did could have begun to compare to the work our LORD has so graciously accomplished. We glory for the moment, but we are soldiers trained for battle by the Lord of Hosts. And we aren't ready to retire. Even though no babies will be killed at 1103 Lucerne Terrace for the time being, 4500 babies a day in this nation are still being murdered, and millions of people are lost and headed, rather quickly, for an eternity in a devil's hell. We glory for the moment, yes...but our work is not yet done.


Lauren said...

Painfully true, but beautifully written, your post just matched my heart-cry, and even made me weep.

God help us all, "knowing the terror of the Lord" to "persuade men", and to labor by His working in us on behalf of those who can not speak for themselves.

Praise the Lord, though, for this moment of rejoicing, as you wrote.

Satan said...

i'll get you.